Zero ***ks: Give Yourself a Break

Give Yourself a Break

It’s not what you think!

It’s TASKS.

ZERO TASKS!!!

Yep, that’s right. This coming Sunday, November 1, is Zero Tasking Day and we’re doing the task of providing you an out so you can give zero tasks for a day.

 

The WONDERFUL time of year that is Daylight Savings Time is coming and we will “gain an extra hour” of time… a.k.a. everyone in your house (especially young children) will be thrown off of their sleep schedules, people will show up at the wrong time for appointments, and the sun will be there to greet you extra early in the morning just for fun.

But some smart soul decided that the notion of using this “extra hour” to work was a very silly idea. Instead they invented our new favorite holiday so you can use that time to do what you really want to do instead: absolutely nothing.

Here is a handy-dandy guide to follow for when you wake up on Sunday morning:

 

Planned to go to the gym today?

Call your workout buddy, or better yet use less energy and text them, to say that you will be cancelling your session because you have zero tasks to give. No treadmill, no free weights, not even that bike you sit on and pedal just to keep the tv sound running. You can’t burn calories because that is a task and those are not allowed today.

Your family needs to be fed?

Well, Mommy is not cooking meals today. That is a task, and you have none of those to give. Throw them an applesauce pouch and pour out some cold black beans onto their plate… that’s two food groups at least. For dinner, cash in that free rewards pizza you’ve been saving up for a rainy day. It’s not raining? Well, it looks like the sky didn’t want to perform any tasks either. You and Old Blue can team up on this one because you both have zero tasks to give.

Do you have chores that need to get done?

Well, that pile of dishes in the sink and dog-hair covered floor will just have to stay that way for one more day, because Dad is taking a break today. Let’s be honest, there’s just going to be more dog hair on the floor again in 2 hours and you don’t need dishes anyway since you are subsisting on pizza and pouches for the time being. So just tell yourself they’re “soaking” and stay out of the kitchen until tomorrow. You have zero tasks to give to your house today.

How do you decide what does and doesn’t get done on Zero Tasking Day?

That’s easy! Let me help you.

Does showering sound like a chore? Don’t do it!

Does it sound like a nice reprieve? Go for it!

Does folding the piles of laundry seem daunting? Leave it in the basket.

Does folding help you relax? Have at it!

Does taking your kids to the park feel like really hard work? Let them play by themselves.

Does it sound like a fun family outing? Go have a blast!

See? Easy peasy.

If something makes you happy, please do it! That’s what days of rest are for.

If it sounds like a difficult task? Take a page out of Bruno Mars’s book and DO NOTHING AT ALL today.

Better yet, hire a postpartum doula to support you while you rest.

Because, today, you just have zero tasks to give.


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